Hello, hello!
Today I want to let something off my heart that's been bugging me for quite a while now. I hate the fact that people always use other people who have a weaker mind, can't say no, or know they will do things for them anyway. I am one of those people who is easy to make use of. I experienced it twice on a large scale, which pretty much left me with some sort of paranoid ideas that it happens all the time. Sort of like PTSD. The first time it happened to me I was fully aware of it. I just couldn't make it stop because I pretty much didn't have the confidence. The second time it happened behind my back and I am still bothered by this. I thought the person was my friend. I find it even harder to trust people because of this. Nowadays these kind of things still bother me.
Now to something different; it probably doesnt have anything to do with the above, but it does involve some paranoia. You know when you are among a group of people and everyone is fully aware that you are there, but pretends you aren't? Unless of course they need something from you. That's when they do know you exist. This happened at work twice. Today was the second time. I don't know how to feel about this, sometimes I feel like a ghost. Sometimes I wonder if I even exist. Ah enough about that now.
The weather sure is nice lately (except the rain). No cold and snow anymore! Can't wait for spring! I love the soft breezes and everything regaining color and coming to life. Ahh..
Well I am off now :)
Sleep well!
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