September 28th 2014

Hello everyone,

Let me start by apologizing for my lack of updates. I've been absent for a while.
A lot has happened recently, and I just didn't feel like updating my blog. I am sorry for this, but I hope you understand.


Let me start off by a few weeks back.
I had two weeks off and my sister Lia came to visit me. We had a great time, and I was happy there was someone in the house to talk to. Not just someone, my best friend and sister!
We went to Nijmegen, played pool twice, watched a lot of netflix, cooked together, played games together, sang together in Singstar ( I love that game ) and least but not least we went out for dinner at Sushi Koi, one of my favourite restaurants. She went back home on a Thursday evening.

The next day I had to take a good rest from my schedule that changed drastically in the past week. Normally I go to sleep at 23 and wake up at 7. There were times I went to sleep 5 in the morning! So yeah..I had some trouble with that. Unfortunately that wasn't the only thing bothering me.
Realizing I was all alone again in the house, and missing people around me I started to feel sad. Not just sad, but a beginning depression. Walked around with it for two days before I finally told myself to stop being silly. I am not alone. I've got people around me, just not here.
I did realize something though, when I have to cry there is no one around to give me a hug.

The next Sunday I woke up and found a message on facebook of a person who was supposed to be forgotten. Unfortunately I could never let that part go and it kept coming back haunting me over and over. So bad I even dreamt of this person. However I kept telling myself it would go away eventually. It didn't. In a way I was so happy this person messaged me. The person in question tried contacting me in the past over and over. I just tried to ignore it. However the more I've been ignoring it, the more the thought became present until it was even taking over my dreams.
Back to the subject I've answered the message and finally spoke to this person after a good 2 years. I was able to get rid off my demons, and I guess we both found our peace. It still meant we parted separate ways. This person still hurt me, and even though I've forgiven, I do not forget. Going separate ways is the best option here. I must say after this conversation I felt like this huge burden I've been walking around for 2 years is gone now. I'm a free man. A free man with choices not influenced by anyone else. A choice I've made myself, A choice that shows that I have my value as well. I used to think I was a nobody, someone whose opinion didn't count. Someone who was weak.
Not anymore. After my vacation I've realized how valuable I am. I am somebody!

When I started work on Monday I didn't feel that well still. However at the end of the day I figured out I missed my work and my colleagues. They both mean a lot to me. My work gives me structure in my life, something I really need for me to function properly in society. My colleagues are like my family to me. I am happy to have people around me. People to talk to, people who understand you. People who want the best for you. That's all of you, and I am happy you are there. This is for my colleagues.

Being back in my structured life I've been playing pool again yesterday too. Been there for 4 hours straight again! Gotta love it. However I was still kind of tired from the last week so around the end I started to get drowsy.
When I was back home Altair wanted attention so I started petting him. Until all of a sudden he started nibbling on my ear! Haha! These love bites of him certainly made me feel happy!

Now this morning I had a good jog again! I am pretty proud of myself! I've also lost the kg's I've gained during my vacation, and a little extra as well! I was 104,8 kg before my vacation, 106,2 kg during my vacation, and today I was 104,5! I'm glad it's going the right way!
Now today I will see Martin again and we're going to the area close to Airbase Terlet to shoot some photos. If we are lucky we will also see gliders! So all in all, a great day!
Oh before I forget..I've treated myself to Super Mario 3D World for the WiiU on friday, because I'm worth it (and I had money left from last month).

This is all for today!
Hopefully I see you guys soon! Have a great day!

Yours truly,

Mike